Polyamory Australia

Hi, this is the first time I have thought about writing publically about the relationship that has developed in my life over the past 14 months. Prior to this I had been happily married for over 27 years and had never even considered a second relationship of any kind.

My wife and I have, for very many years, been looking for her missing identical twin who we finally located in late 2008. It was apparent after only a few days that my wife's sis was in a very bad relationship - even though it had lasted well over 20 years. Initially we did all we could to see if we could help salvage that marriage but sadly it proved to be beyond repair.

As my wife's twin was living in another country we decided that it would be better if she could immigrate to Australia (something we are still in the process of working on) but it was only a matter of a few weeks before I realised I was having (what I regarded at the time) as inappropriate feelings for what was effectively my sister in law. I talked this over with my wife, trying to understand why, after so many years of a very happy marriage I was having these feelings.

Much to my surprise my wife did not object at all, in fact she encouraged me to share my feelings with her sister. At the time I was very confused about all this. There were all sorts of concerns, not least of which was the fact that I would be breaking up someone else's marriage if my feelings were reciprocated.

We spent 2 months overseas and during that time I did eventually broach the subject and let my feelings out. When it came time to leave it was heartbreaking for all three of us. Even though by that time there had been no physical contact at all, we had all bonded emotionally and parting was one of the most traumatic events in all our lives.

We stayed in touch as much as possible over the next two months and the relationship deepened as we shared more information about ourselves.

Bear in mind this relationship I was developing was being paralleled by the new relationship my wife was developing with her sister after almost 50 years apart.

After 2 months my wife's sis joined us for what we expected was going to just be a 3 week holiday in Aus. When the time apporached for her to go home she could not go. It simply would have been too devastating for all of us to be separated once again.

She resigned from her job and we started the process of applying to have her stay permanently with us over here.

I guess, looking back, I did wonder how I would react to my wife's twin once we met for the first time. I never expected anything like what happened adn the chances of such a thing occuring must be very slim indeed.

We have all been through tough times in our lives and we still have a lot to work out before we can get back to anything like a normal existance but we have decided that we will stay together for the rest of our lives and the bond between us strengthens with each passing day.

I still have some concerns about the morality of what I did as my actions effected the lives of other people but when I found out just how similar the two girls are and then found that my wife's sis was in such a terrible state, I simply could not leave her to her fate.

One year on from the start of our poly relationship we could not be happier. The love that exists between all of us continues to deepen and grow and we feel that the missing piece in all our lives is finally in place.

This is such an unusual story and some of the details sound like something out of a fiction novel but we have come to believe that events were influenced by powers that we do not really comprehend. Events that happened many years ago all came together just at the right time enabling us to end up where we are today.

I hesitate to say that it was planned out by God but it does feel like something beyond our personal actions was behind all this.