Well, after dicsussing our boundaries and rules for the opening up
of our 2 year old marriage we are about to take the plunge.
There is a lovely young woman who has had my eye for some time and I
can now do something about it. If I can get the chance to talk
to her, I am going to ask her out tonight.
This is going to be difficult. She is actually a friend of
both myself and my wife - she doesn't know about our open
relationship. Yet. My wife does know how I feel about her
and is OK with me asking her out. So I have a double whammy. I
have to tell her about our open relationship, which always has the
opportunity to turn out badly. If I don't do this, she'll most
likely assume that I am attempting to cheat on my wife. This is
definitely NOT a good thing when you're putting it all out there.
Talking about 'putting it all out there', I also have the age
old dilemma of putting my heart on the line and at her mercy.
If she says "No", I'll be devastated. But now I have
someone who can console me - my lovely caring wife. Something I
never had when I was single all those years ago.
If she says "Yes", then we will have to start dealing
with all the things we have talked about. So far all of our
rules, boundaries and "I am positive I have no issues with you
sleeping with, falling in love with anybody" have been mostly
theoretical. Will we be able to handle it? Have we
set down a framework that is suitable? What about the New
Relationship Energy? Scheduling?
Anyway, the above paragraph might just be purely academic -
there's a chance she will say "No". I always thought
I would be less anxious asking out someone now that we have this open
relationship as I have my wife to come home to. But having the
whole coming out AND asking out in one in go... damn. I'm like
a high school kid asking the hottest girl in the grade if she'd want
to go to the formal with me.
I am hoping she says "Yes", for more than the fact I get
to share some of my life with her. It will give us a chance to
test our open relationship in a relatively safe way. As she is
a friend of both of us, we both know her. We both know where
she is coming from and what she's like. To a certain extent.
Anyway, lets see how we go.
Ciao for now
Shadow
